Give Me a Break, or Rather, Take One

One of the perks of working at a dot-com consulting company during the late-90s Internet boom was the clichéd ping pong breaks. Sure, we had coffee, too, but having the ping pong table in the office felt youthful and carefree. Who didn’t love hitting something during the day amidst busy projects?

My ping pong table—both literal and figurative—is catching dust in our basement. As much as I have been striving for better balance, I still get caught up in the crazy, chaotic busy-ness of our days and weeks. But that’s not healthy. In my head I often hear Nell Carter sing the theme song from the 1980s TV show, “Gimme a Break.”

Are we too busy coordinating our kids’ lives? Working? Running to the grocery store? Doing laundry? That we can’t squeeze in mini breaks for our sanity’s sake?

Last week my graceful yoga instructor made an off-hand comment, that in yoga we do a series of poses, and then we recover with a rest, like child’s pose. And she remarked, “Wouldn’t it be nice in life if we took more breaks like in yoga?” Which, of course, got me thinking.

Then a Harvard Business Review article popped up in my Twitter feed, “The Making of a Corporate Athlete” by Jim Loehr and Tony Schwartz, which puts another spin on the need for downtime. They liken high performance athletes with power executives, recognizing the need for energy renewal for business leaders to be more successful—just as those in sports need rest to be better on the field/court/turf. They write:

In the living laboratory of sports, we learned that the real enemy of high performance is not stress, which, paradoxical as it may seem, is actually the stimulus for growth. Rather, the problem is the absence of disciplined, intermittent recovery. Chronic stress without recovery depletes energy reserves, leads to burnout and breakdown, and ultimately undermines performance.

Anyone ever feel burnout? No need to undermine our lives, because, let’s face it—we perform all of the time. We may not be on the cover of Fortune or Sports Illustrated, but our lives move at a pressured pace. The importance of rest still remains. In this rat race of life we are all high powered executives, all super athletes, striving, on some days, to simply survive. I just think of Ivan Drago pounding on Rocky’s scarlet boxing gloves saying, “I must break you.” And I suppose… better to take a break versus feeling shattered ourselves.

 

For additional reading...“The Making of a Corporate Athlete” article:

The Making of a Corporate Athlete

 

 

Be a Mean Girl

I haven’t written a post in awhile. For many reasons. One being that dear friends have been caretaking their 12 year-old daughter, first bedside in a children’s hospital’s cardiac ICU, and now at home.

Who am I to ponder questions of getting older when a young girl fights for her life with her family soldiering alongside? When my friends live in a separate reality that most never witness? Seems rather indulgent of me.

When kids get sick and face life-threatening illnesses...most sane people with a heart question why. How could “this” happen to a child and his or her family? People will tsk, shake their heads, some say a silent prayer, and hope to dear life for faith and healing. And shudder at the thought of going through a daunting hell.

Back in July my beautiful friend looked at me with pleading eyes when I asked how they are all doing. She responded, “I really hope there’s meaning in all of this. That being sick has brought meaning to people—either bringing the community closer together or something else powerful.”

I can’t speak for everyone who’s been affected by a sick child, but I can attest how much this family and strong girl have impacted me. Here are my observations:

·         A parent’s powerful love for a child is limitless. And when tested that strength grows in unbounded ways.

·         People’s perspectives do shift. They are touched and reminded of life’s fragility and importance.

·         Generosity abounds. I have seen how people respond, being awed by anonymous monetary donations, people giving of their time, and many reminders of constant thoughtfulness.

·         Faith stands out as a core to survival. Faith in family, in friends, in medicine, in miracles, in a higher power, in a mysterious, ever-changing life flow.

·         Children should not be underestimated. By their resilience, their compassion, and their ability to still be kids despite challenging circumstances.

They have showed me the importance of gratitude and taking the time to pause and reflect.

Appreciating meaning makes life more substantial, true. But you don’t have to witness a life-threatening illness to bring more meaning to your life—and to others. I suggest striving to be a “mean” girl…or man. I’m not saying to take a tip from Tina Fey’s 2004 hit movie, Mean Girls, but rather to stop and think whether you live with purpose towards the people you value. That if suddenly you were absent, would it matter? Would you be missed?

Don’t miss out on real relationships, true connections. Be mean…ingful. As American spiritual essayist Thomas Merton wrote, “We do not find the meaning of life by ourselves alone - we find it with another.”

Not only seek meaning from challenging, heart-gripping situations like when a community rallies around a family with a sick child, but continue to look for truths in everyday circumstances…and look within to make a difference in someone else’s life. Be significant. Be faithful. Simply be there.